Do you ever get a Rahh Wave? A Rahh Wave is basically an ongoing phase of life madness and chaos where everything gets busier, wilder, more hectic, more packed out, more stressful and more patience straining until EVENTUALLY the wave peaks. You are ejected and sent rolling onto the beach, where you lie. Gasping.
Today I have been well and truly ejected from a Rahh Wave.
Honestly. If I could bottle and share with you the condensed madness that has been my life these last few weeks, just one sniff would knock you out cold. It would!
We’re talking really intense stuff here. And this weekend the whole thing climaxed. Yup. T’was officially the crest of the RAHHH wave.
(my daughter gets told off at school for using “and” at the beginning of her sentences, which then naturally means I have to use the word even more)
… I knew this was the case because I start to attract hideous and bizarre confrontational experiences. Like when an angry bus driver left a piece of paper on my car windscreen saying “You selfish moron!”
I wasn’t even parked on double yellows.
Yep. When the Rahh Waves peaks, you know it because it is as if you become a little stressy magnet and all the attempts of “beingness” in the world are fruitless until the Rahh Waves spits you out.
So like I said, my Rahh Wave peaked on Sunday. In between a million commitments, chores and activities, I went to the shop, bought some bread, walked back to the car along the pavement, passed a po-faced lady talking to a man (there was a metre of space between them) and saying “excuse me” (politely) I slipped through.
As I passed, the man (who in hindsight looked slightly wild in the eye department), reacted by doing this weird hop-back jig type thing to get out of the way. This resulted in his legs getting tangled, tripping over his feet and then, rather ungracefully, falling down on his botty.
And It Was Funny.
Come on – it was.
But obviously I didn’t laugh.
Because that would have been mean.
So instead I quickly turned and said “I’m ever so sorry. I really hope I didn’t cause you to do that”. I did this is my most well spoken voice, which usually works a treat with people of a certain generation. I then retreated to my car which was parked about three footsteps away.
The next thing I know, Husbandy One, who had been following me along the pavement and witnessed the whole thing, slid into the car and said, “That lady out there just called you a “mad little madam” and accused you of pushing that man over.”
See? This is what I’m saying! High blood pressure attracts high blood pressure.
So what did I do?
Well, what can you do in these circumstances? Be response-able? Let it go? Or surrender to the foaming neurosis-white Rahh Wave, letting it rise up inside your body and brain until it spews out of your mouth on some undeserving (ish) lady?
This is what happened…
I took a deep breath.
I slid out of the car.
Swallowing back the majority of the Rahh, I sailed gracefully over to the woman. I then proceeded to elegantly insert my head through her (open) car window and explained in a soothing, yet forthright, well-to-do manner that “I most certainly did not push over the man”. That he “jolly well slipped up all by himself” and “therefore it is not I who is the mad little madam.”
Is it? Is it? Ha? HA?!
Then I swooped back to the car, slid back in to the front seat. I took another deep breath. I looked at Husbandy One. I twisted around and looked at the two kids and my cousin (who was sitting with a shocked expression in the back). I frowned.
“Do you think I’ve just behaved like a Mad Little Madam?”
And they all nodded.
So I nodded, started the ignition and drove home.
But now it’s all over. I just know it’s all going to be okay. The Rahh Wave has finally rolled onto the shore and deposited me in a nice little patch of silky sand and warm sunshine. I’m exhausted and gasping for five minutes peace … but I’m ALIVE. I no longer feel like I am attracting dreadfully upsetting interactions with strangers. And tomorrow … yes you luscious, gorgeous, delicious, lazy little tomorrow … I am going to spend all day schmoodling about and pottering in the garden.
Ahhhhhhhh (she says sighing happily).
Lots of people I’ve talked to today seem to be having similar experiences lately. It feels to me like the whole world is getting a bit of a shake up … not just physically, but emotionally too. Have you ever been caught up in a Rahh Wave? If you have, please share. Then we can all be Mad Little Madams and Misters together. Group hug. Mmmmmm.